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Using the system to batter the victim
Battered Men - The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence
Latest Research Findings
The Risk of Serious Physical Injury from Assault by a Woman Intimate
A Re-Examination of National Violence Against Women Survey Data on Type of Assault by an Intimate
© 1999, 2001 by Bert H. Hoff,1
Draft Paper pending Peer Review and Submission to a Journal This paper may be cited as Hoff, Bert H., The Risk of Serious Physical Injury from Assault by a Woman Intimate: A Re-Examination of National Violence Against Women Survey Data on Type of Assault by an Intimate. MenWeb on-line Journal (ISSN: 1095-5240 http://www.menweb.org/nvawrisk.htm) Retrieved from Web on Nov. 1, 2001..
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SUMMARY: The report on the most recent National Violence Against Women survey (Tjaden & Thoennes, 1998, 2000) examines the percentage of persons surveyed who experience each form of assault, rather than the percentage of those assaulted who experience each form of assault. Thus, it offers no information on how dangerous the situation is once a man or woman is assaulted. Re-examination of the data on the type of assault perpetrated on men and on women by intimates shows that assaulted men are more likely than assaulted women to experience serious assault by being hit with an object, threatened with a knife or being knifed. For the more serious forms of assault (hit with an object, beat up, threatened with a knife or gun, victim of a weapon) 96.8 percent of the women assaulted and 90.5 percent of the men assaulted experienced one of these dangerous forms of assault. For forms of serious assault that do result in injury (hit with object, beat up, used knife, used gun) 68.3 percent of the women assaulted, and 63.5 of the men assaulted, were assaulted in this manner. Applying these percentages to the number of men and women that the NVAW estimates are assaulted by an intimate each year suggests that over a third of a million men will be hit with an object, and over 90,000 will be knifed. Over 180,000 will be threatened with a knife, well over half a million men will be slapped or hit, and well over a half a million pushed, grabbed or shoved. The over-arching conclusion of this paper is that a gender-polarized approach to "family violence" in government-funded and private research, that focuses millions of dollars of research effort only on domestic violence against women does not serve the needs of the 835,000 men that NVAW estimates are victims of family violence each year, of violent women, or of their children.
Current research provides little insight into the risks a man faces if he is assaulted by a woman in an intimate relationship. Family violence research has focused on the relative risks that men and women face, and mask the high number of men at risk, because of the large number of women who are injured as a result of domestic violence. (Straus 1999a) Government sponsored policy research has focused exclusively on the risks that women face from domestic violence (NIJ 1997, NIJ 1999, CDC 1998, CDC 1999), in large part because of women's research projects funded under the federal Violence Against Women Act (NIJ 1997, NIJ 1999, Travis 1997) Even apparently "gender-neutral" programs such as the "Divorce Mediation and Spousal Violence" research by the Denver-based Center for Policy Research, the organization that conducted the National Violence Against Women Survey, focus exclusively on "protecting the interests of abused women." (NIJ, 1999b) Of the 77 "family violence" research projects under the auspices of the National Institute of Justice, none mention family violence by women against men. (NIJ 1997)
The Centers for Disease Prevention and Control is explicit about its gender-exclusive focus regarding domestic violence. "The Centers for Disease Prevention and Control (CDC) has identified intimate partner violence and sexual assaults against women as a significant and costly health issue. ... And intimate partner abuse is not limited to a woman but may involve her children as well." "The CDC is committed to help achieve the Healthy People 2000 objectives of reducing incidents of violence against women." (CDC 1999, Introduction, p. 1) The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) was appropriated $14.3 million in Fiscal Year 1997, focused exclusively on preventing domestic violence against women. (CDC 1998)
The problem is exacerbated, perhaps, because of the "advocacy-based" focus of women women advancing feminist causes or seeking funds for domestic violence programs to serve women. (Gelles 1994, Straus 1999a, Straus 1999b). Straus, for example, describes the "moral agendas and professional roles" of "service providers and feminist activists" advocating for increased resources for domestic violence against women. He observes that it's possible these service providers and advocates do not realize or deny that moral agendas and professional roles are involved." (Straus 1999a).
In the meantime, few programs offer services to battered men or women who batter (Cook 1997, Hoff 1998a, Hoff 1999b, Hoff 1999c) despite the fact that the recent National Violence Against Women survey estimates that over 835,000 men are victims of violence by an intimate each year. (Tjaden & Thoennes, 2000). The CDC found that funding for statewide domestic violence coalitions ranged from $22,000 to nearly $13 million. Some 17 coalitions received over half a million dollars each. They provide services advocacy, systems advocacy, statewide planning, public awareness/community services, and in some cases, direct services. (CDC identified 1,849 local programs, over 90% of which were members of statewide coalitions. Only 67% of these provided shelter services.) (CDC 1999, pp. 6-9, 14) It would appear that serving the needs of people affected by domestic violence is seen as a "win/lose" rather than "win/win" proposition for these activists, in that serving the needs of men is seen as taking away from woman victims. This would suggest that recognizing that 835,000 men each year are estimated to be battered would conflict with the "moral agendas and professional roles" of Tjaden & Thoennes, as described by Straus.
Some of the best data on serious assault by intimates appears to be homicide data, which suggest that four out of ten intimate homicides are of men. (Mercy 1989, Langen & Dawson, 1995, FBI Uniform Crime Reports) Several studies found women more likely than men to initiate serious domestic violence. (Hampton, Gelles & Harrop, 1989, Langhinrichsen-Rohling, J., & Vivian, D., 1994, McLeod 1984, Morse 1985, Russell & Hulston 1992, Stets & Henderson 1991, Straus 1993, Straus, Hambly, Boney-McCoy & Sugarman 1996) Hampton et. al., for example, found in the 1985 National Survey that severe violence of husbands to wives occurred at the rate of 64/1000, while severe violence of wives to husbands was 108/1000. Straus' 1993 paper reported a 1992 severe violence rate of more than 40/1000 for women against men, but 19/1000 by men against women.
Analysis:
The National Violence Against Women survey (hereinafter cited NVAW) has been presented to the public as showing that women are more often the victims of domestic violence. (Straus 1999a) Little attention has been paid to what the survey results show about the extent of the problem for men. The finding that over 835,000 men are victims of domestic violence has simply not been reported by the media. The research report focuses exclusively on women's concerns, and in fact minimizes the impact of domestic violence on men by focusing on the percentage of those surveyed who experience more severe forms of violence, rather than the percentage of those assaulted who experience serious assault. This paper re-examines the NVAW data to look at the risk that domestic violence poses to men.
Table 1 uses the data from Exhibit 11of Tjaden & Thoennes (2000), which reports the "percentage of persons physically assaulted by an intimate partner in lifetime by type of assault and sex of victim." (Tjaden & Thoennes, 2000, exhibit 11) The first two numerical columns, from Tjaden & Thoennes, report the percentage of persons sampled who experienced each form of assault. The second two numerical columns show the percentage of persons assaulted who experienced each form of assault.
Table 1 Type of Assault by an Intimate as Percentage Surveyed and Percentage Assaulted, by Gender Re-analysis of data from NVAW Survey, Tjaden & Thoennes (2000), Exhibit 11
| Type of Assault |
Percent of Surveyed |
Percent of Assaulted |
| |
Women |
Men |
Women |
Men |
| Total |
22.1 |
7.4 |
100% |
100% |
| Threw something |
8.1 |
4.4 |
36.7% |
59.5% |
| Pushed, grabbed, shoved |
18.1 |
5.4 |
81.9% |
73.0% |
| Pulled hair |
9.1 |
2.3 |
41.2% |
31.1% |
| Slapped, hit |
16 |
5.5 |
72.4% |
74.3% |
| Kicked, bit |
5.5 |
2.6 |
24.9% |
35.1% |
| Choked, tried to drown |
6.1 |
0.5 |
27.6% |
6.8% |
| Hit with object |
5 |
3.2 |
22.6% |
43.2% |
| Beat up |
8.5 |
0.6 |
38.5% |
8.1% |
| Threatened with gun |
3.5 |
0.4 |
15.8% |
5.4% |
| Threatened with knife |
2.8 |
1.6 |
12.7% |
21.6% |
| Used gun |
0.7 |
0.1 |
3.2% |
1.4% |
| Used knife |
0.9 |
0.8 |
4.1% |
10.8% |
Note: Highlighting shows which percentage is higher, but does not indicate if the percentage difference is significant.
The problem with reporting the percentage of persons surveyed, of course, is that it magnifies the number of women who experience each form of assault, since a larger number of women surveyed experienced assault in the first place. Hence, these data shed no light on how dangerous any individual assault might be.
Tjaden & Thoennes report:
It is important to note that differences between women's and men's rates of physical assault by an intimate partner become greater as the seriousness of the assault increases. For example, women were two to three times more likely than men to report that an intimate partner threw something that could hurt or pushed, grabbed, or shoved them. However, they were seven to 14 times more likely to report that an intimate partner beat them up, choked or tried to drown them, threatened them with a gun, or actually used a gun on them. (Exhibit 11)
(Tjaden & Thoennes, 2000, p. 27) When we look at the percentage of those assaulted rather than the percentage of those surveyed, however, these apparently-large disparities disappear. Tjaden & Thoennes' analysis above overlooks all three of the areas where men are at more risk than women: being hit with an object, threatened with a knife or being knifed. Men were much more likely than women to be assaulted in this manner if they were assaulted. When one combines the more serious forms of assault (hit with an object, beat up, threatened with a knife or gun, victim of a weapon) 96.8 percent of the women assaulted and 90.5 percent of the men assaulted experienced one of these dangerous forms of assault. A threat, of course, may or may not result in injury. When one looks at the forms of serious assault that do result in injury (hit with object, beat up, used knife, used gun) one finds that 68.3 percent of the women assaulted, and 63.5 of the men assaulted were assaulted in this manner.
In the next table, the percentages in Table 1 are used to provide an estimate of the number of women and men in the U.S. who might experience each form of assault in a year.
Table 2 Type of Assault by an Intimate and Estimated Annual Number in U.S. by Gender Projected from data from NVAW Survey, Tjaden & Thoennes (2000), Exhibit 11
| Type of Assault |
Number in U.S. Each Year |
| |
Women |
Men |
| Total |
1,510,455 |
834,732 |
| Threw something |
553,606 |
496,327 |
| Pushed, grabbed, shoved |
1,237,069 |
609,129 |
| Pulled hair |
621,952 |
259,444 |
| Slapped, hit |
1,093,542 |
620,409 |
| Kicked, bit |
375,905 |
293,284 |
| Choked, tried to drown |
416,913 |
56,401 |
| Hit with object |
341,732 |
360,965 |
| Beat up |
580,944 |
67,681 |
| Threatened with gun |
239,212 |
45,121 |
| Threatened with knife |
191,370 |
180,483 |
| Used gun |
47,842 |
11,280 |
| Used knife |
61,512 |
90,241 |
Caution must be used in interpreting these results. The annual projections are based on the percentage of persons experiencing each form of assault in their lifetime, because the data on the percentage experiencing each form of assault in the last 12 months was not available. A person may experience one, or many, assaults in a lifetime. The important point, however, is the form of assault the survey respondent experienced, not the number of assaults.
It may be true that a person who experiences more than one assault may experience more severe assaults. However, people assaulted in the last year, too, may have experienced more than one assault in the last year. The issue, then, is whether the types of intimate assault a person experienced in the last year differs greatly from the types of intimate assault they experienced over their lifetime.
Memories may be more unreliable over a longer period of time. Further, as Straus has observed (Straus 1999a, Straus 1999b) the NVAW survey is more like a crime survey than a family violence survey, with its focus on incidents that are crimes or threats to physical safety. It is plausible that women are more likely to remember such events because they are more frightening to women. (Straus, 1999c). Taking Straus' insight one step further, if women are more likely to remember being pushed, grabbed, shoved, slapped or hit as "frightening," "lifetime" memories of men and women regarding serious assault, like being stabbed with a knife, are more likely to be similar.
Note that in the NVAW survey a higher percentage of men reported being assaulted in the last year, than reported being assaulted in their lifetime. Of those assaulted in their lifetime, 76.5% were women, while of those assaulted in the last 12 months, only 62.5% were women. One possible explanation for the difference could be that men might remember being pushed or slapped in the last year, but might not remember it if it happened several years ago. This could suggest that memory of the serious assaults in a lifetime are more likely to be the same for both genders, and closer to the reliability of "last 12 months" memories, than "lifetime" memories of less serious assaults which men may not be as likely to see as "frightening." Thus, projection of "lifetime" data on the type of assault against "12 month" data on the number of assaults might well be more reliable for serious assaults, the focus of this paper on the risks men face, than it is for less-serious forms of assault.
Dr. Malcolm George of the St Bartholomew's and Royal London Hospital Medical School, author of Aggression in British Heterosexual Relationships, offers these comments on why the discrepancy between "last 12 months" and "lifetime" gender ratios.
When the policy focus is on the number of men affected, rather than on the percentage of men who experience assault by an intimate in their lives, the significance of the social issues concerning battered men becomes more apparent, even if women are assaulted at a higher rate or injured more frequently. Over a third of a million are hit with an object during a domestic dispute each year. Some 90,000 are knifed, and over 180,000 threatened with a knife. Well over half a million are slapped or hit, and well over half a million are pushed, grabbed or shoved.. The numbers may vary if one uses type of assault within the last 12 months data rather than type of assault in lifetime, but a problem that might affect a third of a million or a half a million men each year is a matter of social concern.
Discussion:
More research and analysis is needed to reconcile the results here, on the type of assault, with the results of the many other studies using the CTS or revised CTS. Straus, for example, reports that women are seven to ten times more likely to be injured in a domestic violence assault (Straus 1999) But many of the studies cited in Fiebert's annotated bibliography (Fiebert, 1997) report no great disparity in the number of women and number of men subject to serious physical assault by an intimate.
One obvious area of further exploration is to derive estimates of the number of men and women subject to each form of assault, based on NVAW data on assaults "in the last 12 months" rather than "in lifetime," if and when the data on type of assault within the last 12 months become available.
The over-arching conclusion of this paper is that a gender-polarized approach to "family violence" in government-funded and private research, that focuses millions of dollars of research effort only on domestic violence against women does not serve the needs of the 835,000 men that NVAW estimates are victims of family violence each year, of violent women, or of their children.
REFERENCES
References cited in this paper:
Centers for Disease Prevention and Control (CDC). (1998) FAMILY AND INTIMATE VIOLENCE PREVENTION PROGRAM (updated 06.29.98). http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/dvp/vawprograms/Default.htm Retrieved from Web on Jan. 10, 1999. Extensive survey of domestic violence programs, stressing services to women and containing no information on services available to men.
Centers for Disease Prevention and Control (CDC). (1999) Inventory of Services and Funding Sources for Programs Designed to Prevent Violence Against Women (undated). Available in Adobe .PDF format on the Web at: http://www.cdc.gov/ncipc/dvp/vawprograms/Default.htm Retrieved from Web on Jan. 10, 1999. Extensive survey of domestic violence programs, stressing services to women and containing no information on services available to men. The introduction to this inventory is available on MenWeb as a .PDF document.
Cook, P. W. (1997). Abused men: The hidden side of domestic violence. Westport, CT: Praeger.
Fiebert, M. S. (1997). Annotated bibliography: References examining assaults by women on their spouses/partners. In B. M. Dank & R. Refinette (Eds..), Sexual harassment & sexual consent (Vol. 1, pp. 273-286). New Brunswick: Transaction Publishers. Also: Sexuality and Culture, 1997, 1, 273-286., updated version retrieved from Web site 1/5/99
Fiebert, M. S., & Gonzalez, D. M. (1997). College women who initiate assaults on their male partners and the reasons offered for such behavior. Psychological Reports, 80, 583-590.
Gelles, R. J. (1994). Research and advocacy: Can one wear two hats? Family Process, 33, 93-95.
Hoff, Bert H. (1999a). The Gender Neutrality Joke. MenWeb on-line Journal (ISSN: 1095-5240 http://www.menweb.org/gjdvneut.htm) Retrieved from Web on Jan. 8, 1999..
Hoff, Bert H. (1999b). Official Washington Policy: Blame the Victim. MenWeb on-line Journal (ISSN: 1095-5240 http://www.menweb.org/gjdvneut..htm) Retrieved from Web on Jan. 8, 1999.
Hoff, Bert H. (1999c). Battered? Here's What You Can DO MenWeb on-line Journal (ISSN: 1095-5240 http://www.menweb.org/gjdvneut.htm) Retrieved from Web on Jan. 9, 1999. Lists all known North American programs that serve men.
Langen, Patrick A. & Dawson, John M. (1995). Spouse Murder Defendants in Large Urban Counties National Institute of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, Executive Summary. (September 1995, NCJ-156831)
Mercy, J. A., & Saltzman, L. E. (1989)
. Fatal violence among spouses in the United States, 1975-85. American Journal of Public Health, 79, 595-599.. (Examined FBI figures regarding spousal homicides. During the 10 year period from 1975 to 1985 found higher murder rates of wives than husbands <43.4% vs 56.6%>. Wives and husbands were equally likely to be killed by firearms <approximately 72% of the time> while husbands were more likely to be stabbed and wives more likely to bludgeoned to death.)
Violence Against Women and Family Violence: Research and Evaluation Program Grants, National Institute of Justice, Office of Justice Programs United States Department of Justice, December 1997.
(http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/vawprog/contents.htm) Retrieved from Web on Jan. 10, 1999. Lists 8 Violence Against Women Act projects for FY 1997, 13 Violence Against Women Act Projects Before FY 1997, 15 Family Violence and Violence Against Women Projects Supported Directly by NIJ, 6 Projects Supported by COPS Office Funds, 12 Interagency Consortium on Violence Against Women and Violence Within the Family, 5 Mandated Studies Under VAWA (Completed) and 18 Completed Projects. None of these 77 projects discuss domestic violence against men or female perpetrators of domestic violence.
National Institute of Justice (1998). Violence Against Women and Family Violence Research and Evaluation Program. (updated on 07/21/98 12:42:35 ) (http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/vawprog.htm) Retrieved from Web on Jan. 10, 1999. "The mission of the Violence Against Women and Family Violence Research and Evaluation program is to promote the safety of women and family members, and to increase the efficiency and effectiveness of the criminal justice system's response to these crimes.."
National Institute of Justice (1999). Interagency Consortium on Violence Against Women and Violence within the Family: Projects from the January 26, 1996 Request For Applications (undated) (http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/vawprog/inter.htm) Retrieved from Web on Jan. 10, 1999. "Coordinated by the Office of Behavioral and Social Sciences Research (OBSSR), this inter-departmental and trans- NIH program was co-sponsored by the NIH Office of Research on Women's Health (ORWH), the NIH Office of Research on Minority Health (ORMH), the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA), the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH), the National Institute on Aging (NIA), the National Institute of Justice (NIJ), the National Center on Child Abuse and Neglect (NCCAN), and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC)."
National Institute of Justice (1999b). Completed Projects: Divorce Mediation and Spousal Violence-Jessica Pearson, Center for Policy Research, January 1, 1994 through December 31, 1995. (undated) (http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/nij/vawprog/comp12.htm) Retrieved from Web on Jan. 10, 1999.
Straus, Murray A. (1999a), In Press. "The Controversy over Domestic Violence by Women: A Methodological, Theoretical, and Sociology of Science Analysis." in Violence in Intimate Relationships, edited by X. Arriaga and S. Oskamp. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage. Paper presented at the Claremont Symposium on Applied Social Psychology on Violence in Intimate Relationships: Claremont Graduate University, Claremont, CA, 28 February 98.
Straus, Murray A. (1999b), In Press. "Characteristics of the National Violence Against Women Study that might explain the low assault rate for both sexes and the even lower rate for women." in Violence in Intimate Relationships, edited by X. Arriaga and S. Oskamp. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage.
Straus, M. A. (1999c). Personal communication Jan. 4, 1999.
Tjaden, P. G., & Thoennes, N. (2000). Full Report of Prevalence, Incidence and Consequences of Violence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey. U.S. Department of Justice, National Institute of Justice & Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Research Report, Nov. 2000. NCJ 183781
Tjaden, P. G., & Thoennes, N. (2000). Extent, Nature and Consequences of Intimate Partner Violence: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey. U.S. Department of Justice, National Institute of Justice & Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Research Report, July 2000. NCJ 181867
Tjaden, P. G., & Thoennes, N. (1998). Prevalence, Incidence and Consequences of Violence Against Women: Findings from the National Violence Against Women Survey. U.S. Department of Justice, National Institute of Justice & Centers for Disease Control and Prevention Research in Brief series, November, 1998. NCJ 172837
Travis, Jeremy (1996). Violence Against Women: Reflections on NIJ's Research Agenda. U.S. Department of Justice, National Institute of Justice, National Institute of Justice Journal #230: Thinking Globally to Act Locally. P. 21. Published: February 1996
References comparing serious assault by men and women intimates:
(Summaries are extracted from Fiebert, "References Examining Assaults by Women on Their Spouses or Male partners: An Annotated Bibliography (Sexuality and Culture, 1997, 1, 273-286., updated version retrieved from Web site 1/5/99) and edited to focus on findings regarding serious violence.)
Cascardi, M., Langhinrichsen, J., & Vivian, D. (1992). Marital aggression: Impact, injury, and health correlates for husbands and wives. Archives of Internal Medicine, 152, 1178-1184. (Examined 93 couples seeking marital therapy. Found using the CTS and other information: While men and women were equally likely to perpetrate violence, women reported more severe injuries. Half of the wives and two thirds of the husbands reported no injuries as a result of all aggression, but wives sustained more injuries as a result of mild aggression.)
Hampton, R. L., Gelles, R. J., & Harrop, J. W. (1989). Is violence in families increasing? A comparison of 1975 and 1985 National Survey rates. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 51, 969-980. (Compared a sample of 147 African Americans from the 1975 National Survey with 576 African Americans from the 1985 National Survey with regard to spousal violence. Using the CTS found that the rate of severe violence of husbands to wives decreased 43% (113 to 64/1000) from 1975 to 1985, while the rate of severe violence of wives to husbands increased 42% (76 to 108/1000) from 1975 to 1985.)
Langhinrichsen-Rohling, J., & Vivian, D. (1994). The correlates of spouses' incongruent reports of marital aggression. Journal of Family Violence, 9, 265-283. (In a clinic sample of 97 couples seeking marital therapy, authors found, using a modified version of the CTS, that 36% of husbands and 53% of wives were classified as severely aggressive.)
McLeod, M. (1984). Women against men: An examination of domestic violence based on an analysis of official data and national victimization data. Justice Quarterly, 1, 171-193. (From a data set of 6,200 cases of spousal abuse in the Detroit area in 1978-79 found that men used weapons 25% of the time while female assailants used weapons 86% of the time, 74% of men sustained injury and of these 84% required medical care. Concludes that male victims are injured more often and more seriously than female victims.)
Mercy, J. A., & Saltzman, L. E. (1989). Fatal violence among spouses in the United States, 1975-85. American Journal of Public Health, 79, 595-599. (Examined FBI figures regarding spousal homicides. During the 10 year period from 1975 to 1985 found higher murder rates of wives than husbands <43.4% vs 56.6%>. Wives and husbands were equally likely to be killed by firearms <approximately 72% of the time> while husbands were more likely to be stabbed and wives more likely to bludgeoned to death.)
Morse, B. J. (1995). Beyond the Conflict Tactics Scale: Assessing gender differences in partner violence. Violence and Victims, 10 (4) 251-272. (Data was analyzed from the National Youth Survey, a longitudinal study begun in 1976 with 1,725 subjects who were drawn from a probability sample of households in the United States and who, in 1976, were between the ages of 11-17. This study focused on violence as assessed by the CTS between male and female married or cohabiting respondents during survey years 1983 <n=1,496>, 1986 <n=1,384>, 1989 <n=1,436>, and 1992 <n=1,340>. For each survey year the prevalence rates of any violence and severe violence were significantly higher for female to male than for male to female. For example, in 1986, the rate of severe violence male to female was 9.5, while the rate of severe violence female to male was 22.8. In 1992, ... severe violence rate male to female of 5.7; ... severe violence rate female to male of 13.8. In 1986 about 20% of both men and women reported that assaults resulted in physical injuries. In other years women were more likely to self report personal injuries.)
Russell, R.. J. H., & Hulson, B. (1992). Physical and psychological abuse of heterosexual partners. Personality and Individual Differences, 13, 457-473. (In a pilot study in Great Britain 46 couples responded to the Conflict Tactics Scale. Results reveal that husband to wife violence was: Overall violence= 25% and severe violence= 5.8%; while wife to husband violence was: Overall violence= 25% and severe violence=11.3%.)
Stets, J. E. & Henderson, D. A. (1991). Contextual factors surrounding conflict resolution while dating: results from a national study. Family Relations, 40, 29-40. (Drawn from a random national telephone survey, daters <n=277; men=149, women=128> between the ages of 18 and 30, who were single, never married and in a relationship during the past year which lasted at least two months with at least six dates were examined with the Conflict Tactics Scale. Women were "6 times more likely than men to use severe aggression <19.2% vs. 3.4%>...Men were twice as likely as women to report receiving severe aggression <15.7% vs. 8%>.")
Straus, M. A. (1993). Physical assaults by wives: A major social problem. In R. J. Gelles & D. R. Loseke (Eds.), Current controversies on family violence pp. 67-87. Newbury Park, CA:Sage. (Reviews literature and concludes that women initiate physical assaults on their partners as often as men do.) Straus, M. A. (1995). Trends in cultural norms and rates of partner violence: An update to 1992. In S. M. Stich & M. A. Straus (Eds.)
Understanding partner violence: Prevalence, causes, consequences, and solutions (pp. 30-33). Minneapolis, MN: National Council on Family Relations. (Reports that severe physical assaults by men declined by 48% from 1975 to 1992--38/1000 to 19/1000 while severe assaults by women did not change from 1975 to 1992 and remained above 40/1000.)
Straus, M. A., Hamby, S. L., Boney-McCoy, S., & Sugarman, D. B. (1996). The Revised Conflict Tactics Scales (CTS2). Development and preliminary psychometric data. Journal of Family Issues, 17, 283-316. (The revised CTS has clearer differentiation between minor and severe violence and new scales to measure sexual coercion and physical injury. Used the CTS2 with a sample of 317 college students <114 men, 203 women> and found that: 16% of men and 14% of women reported being seriously injured by their partners.)
Vivian, D., & Langhinrichsen-Rohling, J. (1996). Are bi-directionally violent couples mutually victimized? In L. K. Hamberger & C. Renzetti (Eds.) Domestic partner abuse (pp. 23-52). New York: Springer. (Authors found using a modified version of the CTS, that in a sample of 57 mutually aggressive couples, there were no significant differences between husbands' and wives' reports concerning the frequency and severity of assault victimization. With regard to injuries, 32 wives and 25 husbands reported the presence of a physical injury which resulted from partner aggression.)
Bert H. Hoff, J.D., formerly affiliated with the School of Social Policy at The American University and a former research scientist at the Battelle Human Affairs Research Centers, is publisher of Men's Voices quarterly. He is WebMaster of MenWeb, the only resource in Washington that offers public education and victim education/outreach for male victims of domestic violence. His prior research has been published in the Journal of the Association of Advancement of Psychiatry and the Law, University of Pennsylvania Law Review, Journal of the Albert Einstein School of Medicine, and numerous government-funded research reports.
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Help for Battered Men
Are You Abused?
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Are you battered or abused? Ask yourself these questions:
Victims of domestic violence come from all walks of life — all cultures, all income groups, all ages, all religions. [MenWeb: They also come in both sexes..] They share feelings of helplessness, isolation, guilt, fear, and shame.
All hope it won't happen again, but often it does.
ARE YOU ABUSED? DOES THE PERSON YOU LOVE...
• "Track" all of your time? • Constantly accuse you of being unfaithful? • Discourage your relationships with family and friends? • Prevent you from working or attending school? • Criticize you for little things? • Anger easily when drinking or on drugs? • Control all finances and force you to account in detail for what you spend? • Humiliate you in front of others? • Destroy personal property or sentimental items? • Hit, punch, slap, kick, or bite you or the children? • Use or threaten to use a weapon against you? • Threaten to hurt you or the children? • Force you to have sex against your will?
If you find yourself saying yes, it's time to get help.
Developed by the National Crime Prevention Council in Partnership with MOTOROLA®.
Anger and conflict is common in a relationship. What's important is how we handle it. Has it gone too far? Is there an anger problem you need help with? Here are some "anger indicators," from the Web site of Jerry Medol's highly-successful, male-positive Kansas City Alternatives to Anger program. Are any of these true for your relationship? If so, get help!
1. If anybody is being touched or controlled or dominated, if any abuse is being forced against the will of another, there is abuse going on ...it is likely to be violent ... it is an anger problem.
2. If you feel attacked or criticized or shamed, or if you find yourself on the defensive a lot ...you have an anger problem.
3. If you find yourself not able to listen or if you find yourself shaming another person ...you have an anger problem.
4. If either or both of you are raging about what is going on ... you both have an anger problem.
5. If either of you feels that you are pushed to the point that you must "take control", verbally or physically ... that is an anger problem.
6. If you are in a relationship with somebody who has an anger problem ... you also have an anger problem.
Are You in an Abusive Relationship?
A man who had to deal with abuse issues in his own life (and who has started a message board for abused men) looked into the issue of how a man can know if his relationship is abusive. He found two books that focus on women in abusive relationships, but none for men. He has extracted and edited sections from these books, to make them relevant for men. Click here to see what he came up with.
Ultra-Sensitive Men and Abusive Relationships
Not just for ultra-sensitive men. Ultra-sensitive men don't have different reactions to an abusive relationship, often, they have more intense reactions. They're magnified, and we can see them more clearly. If you recognize any of the patterns you see in this article, whether or not you're ultra-sensitive, it's time to look at whether your relationship is abusive. Some clues:
- Do you dread "talks" with her?
- Does your pulse rise and your mind become foggy at the mere thought of a disagreement or conflict with her?
- Will you do anything to avoid the conflict and keep the peace?
- Do you have inexplicable aches and pains, or tenseness?
- Are these worse when you're around her?
- Do you have panic attacks at the mere thought of conflict, or mere thought of being with her?
- Do you find yourself looking for a lot more "alone time"?
- Does being alone seem a lot more calming and appealing than spending time with her?
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Help for Battered Men
Why Men Don't Do Anything About It
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Here’s some information from Phil Cook’s pamphlet for battered men. (Ordering information: see Phil's Web site. Why not order a handful and try to get your local DV shelter program to put them out?)
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HOW MEN COPE
Taking on a macho “I can handle it” attitude. Even if you have been hurt much worse on an athletic playing field, that is not the same thing as being physically attacked by your intimate partner, which hurts emotionally as well as physically. Allowing this pattern to continue can result in depression, substance abuse, loss of confidence, even suicide. (At its worst, It has resulted in death at the hands or a partner or someone induced to kill you by the partner.)
“Men Don’t Tell.” This is the actual title of a fact-based CBS TV movie about male victims of domestic abuse. Keeping silent, (not confiding to a friend, relative or professional) is a common reaction of both male and female victims of domestic abuse; it’s embarrassing. Men typically face a greater degree of disbelief and ridicule than do most women in this situation, which helps enforce the silence. Domestic violence victims make excuses for injuries that show (“It was an accident” or “it happened while playing sports”) when friends or medical personnel ask about them.
Hiding From it. Men often escape a bad home life that they are afraid of by spending extra time at work, staying in “their” space (garage, den) at home, or even sleeping in the car or at a friends place..
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As my wife and I discussed this and reviewed case histories we're familiar with, we came up with five major, interrelated categories why a man--or a woman--might stay in an abusive relationship:
What will my friends, family, colleagues and neighbors think? What will people think if they knew I let a woman beat up on me? It's a private matter--belongs in the family If I say anything, she'll tell everyone I'm the abusive one, and shame me in public I'm ashamed I'm not strong enough to defend myself. Everyone knows it's men that are the violent ones (shame of male for being male)
I probably deserved it. This is the best I deserve.. With my looks, or age, or personality, or income, this is as good a relationship as I'll ever be able to get.
It's not that bad. All I have to do is leave the house until she cools down. (That's what TV star Phil Hartman said , before his wife murdered him and killed herself.) I can weather this one, just like I did the others.
- Reluctance to Give Up the Good
If people got to know her, they'd see what a creative, or loving, or wonderful person she is. She's like this only some of the time. The sex is great, and I can put up with being batted around a little. I'd be lost without a relationship with her. I'd be lost without a relationship.
It's too hard to do anything. I'm not ready for that much change in my life. I'll do it tomorrow, or later, when I'm not so busy. Sounds like a lot of work--more to take care of than I can handle right now. Force of habit. I'm used to life the way it is now.
Another reason for staying is to protect the kids. The research shows that people--women as well as men--who assault their partners are likely to assault their children, too. If he leaves, chances are he'll never be able to come back. In today's climate, there's a good chance she'll be able to allege that he has assaulted her or assaulted or even sexually abused the kids, and get a protection order on her say-so, barring him from seeing the kids. This was a common theme in many of the battered men's personal stories here on MenWeb. Sorry, guys, but if you need to come up with a safety plan and plan out a way for you and the kids to leave the abusive relationship, you also need a "dose of reality" about what some of the risks and problems are. They aren't insurmountable problems, and many guys have overcome them, but they are difficult ones.
But there's another factor, too. If a man is being battered and trying to protect the kids, and he calls 911, too-frequently he is the one who ends up being arrested. This was another common theme in many of the battered men's personal stories here on MenWeb. At a minimum, he may experience problems getting the police to believe that he's been assaulted or that he needs police help. Family violence researcher Murray A. Straus observes:
Men are also less likely to call the police, even when there is injury, because, like women, they feel shame about disclosing family violence. But for many men, the shame is compounded by the shame of not being able to keep their wives under control. Among this group, a "real man" would be able to keep her under control. Moreover, the police tend to share these same traditional gender role expectations. This adds to the legal and regulatory presumption that the offender is a man. As a result, the police are reluctant to arrest women for domestic assault. Women know this. That is, they know they are likely to be able to get away with it. As in the case of other crimes, the probability of a woman assaulting her partner is strongly influenced by what she thinks she can get away with.
One man's story. Why don't men seek help? A male therapist who had to deal with abuse issues in his own life posted an answer to that on Usenet. Doug Flor was formerly a project coordinator for the Department of Child and Family Development and the Adolescent Development Research Program, Institute for Behavioral Research, The University of Georgia
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Help for Battered Men
What You Can Do About It
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What if you’ve been battered?
Don’t brush it off or ignore it. Talk about it. Tell someone. Realize that you’re not the only one—a lot of other men are in the same boat! Check out the resources listed below.
Check out Washington’s Domestic Violence Hotline Web page. Ignore the articles about “Information for an Abused Woman” and “Emotional Reactions of Abused Women”—they’ll just make you mad. Their other information, “Am I a Victim” and “Your Personal Safety Plan” works for men as well as women.
Read the "warning signs" on Washington State's Domestic Violence page. (Ignore the sexist references like "his" using espionage tactics on "her" -- it cuts both ways. Ignore, too the comments about "exerting power and control through custody issues" as only involving kidnapping kids or holding them hostage -- false allegations of child abuse and domestic violence are frequent strategies of woman batterers.) Read Erin Pizzey's article Working With Violent Women about "family tyrants." Does the term "family tyrant" resonate with you? Then you need to read this article!
Read our selection of men's personal stories about it. You aren't the only one! Hearing other men's stories, and what they did about it, and what they wished they'd done about it, will help you figure out what to do.
Washington’s Domestic Violence Hotline Web page is at:
http://www.domestic-violence.org/
The Washington State Domestic Violence Hotline is:
1-800-562-6025
They can direct you to a local shelter. Have a pencil and paper handy before you call, and take notes. The DSHS Program Manager says that the programs are, by law, to be gender-neutral and offer services to men as well as women.
If you find this not to be true, please e-mail me and tell me of your experience. Be sure to include the name and phone number of the shelter service you called, the date(s) and time(s), the person(s) you spoke to, and what they said.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline is:
1-800-799-7233
The woman I spoke to there suggested I have men call that line if they are victims of domestic violence. She says that most DV shelters serve men as well as women.If you find this not to be true, please e-mail me and tell me of your experience.
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Dating Violence
Dating Violence Against Men
Assault and Sexual Coercion
What can you do?
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The National Center for Victims of Crime says that that as many as 45 percent of females and 43 percent of males reported being the victim of violence from dating partners at least once.1
Note: If you have been the victim of dating violence (hitting, kicking, coerced into sex, stalking) please e-mail me and tell me about it. What happened? Did you tell anyone about it? Why or why not? Did you seek help? Why or why not? If you did seek help, did you get it? May we publish your story here? We'll do it anonymously, unless you give specific permission to use your name and/or e-mail address.
Know a young man who may be the victim of dating assault or sexual coercion? Print out this page and give it to him. Often, it'll be enough to get him to talk to you about it -- if not right away, perhaps in a bit. And talking to another man about it is the first step in healing -- in survival.
Date Rape
 Order on-line |
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Date rape? You can't be serious! But we are. "Date Rape" is being coerced into having unwanted sex. There are lots of forms of coercion—physical force, as in traditional "sexual assault" or rape, is only one.
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 Alan W. McEvoy, Ph.D. |
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Also check out Male Rape: It happens! Not just in prison or among gay men. It's by Dr. Alan W. McEvoy, author of the book If He is Raped
How does a woman force a guy to have unwanted sex? According to expert Cindi Struckman-Johnson, women are most likely to use psychological pressure such as verbal pleading and arguments, emotional blackmail, and deception. Another common approach of sexually aggressive women is to take advantage of a man's intoxicated state. A typical scenario, according to male victims, involves a predatory woman who encounters an inebriated man (or contributes to his drinking) and pursues him until he falls asleep or passes out. The woman then manually or orally stimulates him to erection and mounts him for sexual intercourse.
Sexually aggressive women only occasionally resort to force tactics, which we define as intimidation with size, threats of harm including blackmail, physical restraint, physical harm or use of a weapon. In most cases, the force was not extreme. Women locked men into cars, blocked their retreat from a room, grabbed at them, threw them down on beds and floors, sat on them, and tied them up. In some instances, women pinched, slapped and hit men who tried to stop their advances. A few men reported that women blackmailed them into having sex by threatening to divulge damaging information to parents, employers or girlfriends.
A (male) member of the Board of the Washington Coalition of Sexual Assault Programs told me of the son of a friend. When he wasn't aggressive enough, his date grabbed him by the crotch. The boy was too humiliated to want to tell anyone about it. What would be the outcry if a boy grabbed a girl by the crotch at that dance?
Unwanted sex? So he got lucky, right? Wrong! Unwanted is unwanted, for men as well as women. Men, like women, feel cheap and slimy after an event like that. It interferes with their sexual relationship with the woman they meet later and want to be romantically involved with. It objectifies women as well as men— a "hot topic" for feminists. It treats both parties as objects in which to "get off" in recreational sex, rather than people with whom to form a "whole person" romantic relationship.
It's also abusive. Abuse is about "power and control," as proponents of the "Duluth Model" of domestic violence are quick to tell you. Yes, women use sex for "power and control." And a woman who forces a man to have unwanted sex is exerting "power over."
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Assault


 Books on Dating Violence

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Men, as well as women, are subject to dating assault.
Everything on this site for battered men applies to boys and men physically assaulted by a date, a girlfriend or a partner, too.
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