I am not going to yell at you. I will not get angry at the unfairness of the situation. I will not try and persuade you, nor will I let you know how much I hurt anymore. Instead of these things I will bottle all the negative feelings I have about what is happening between us and push it deep down inside me so you can feel free to feel how you want to feel.

I am going to be here for you. I will be your friend. I will try and look out for you whenever I can. I will hold you when you cry. I will share in your hurt. I will do all the things I can to keep you near without you feeling obligated towards me in any way. I would rather be close to you and see you happy than to get my way.

I will not lie to you and I will not tell you what you want to hear because I love you and if I have to die a little death each and every day I see you from now until forever out of the sadness of knowing that you do not love me as I do you, then I would be glad to die a million times over just to see you each and every day.

I will not stop loving you and I will never turn you away. I will never be able to love another, the way I confess I love you this day. I will keep a piece of me just for you, just in case one day you say "I am in love with you too" because you are worth doing so day after day, year after year, until we grow old together, regardless of knowing that I may never hear those words as long as I live.

I wish I knew what was wrong with me, or what I might change so that you would see me the way I see you. I cry out to god asking why has he put you in my life again when, right now and maybe forever, all I can hope for is to be friends with you each and every day.

I know you might think me dumb for doing this to myself. I know many people would look down their noses at me for letting myself be hurt everyday. But if I could face them, all I would have to say is "I love her" and just walk away. To me love is more powerful than anything else in this world, more powerful even than god himself, and I will never give up on something because it is so hard to do.